Updates:
- I had another round of chemo this week here in Jacksonville. The goal of this treatment is to eliminate the mass on my lung.
- We are starting to pack as we prepare to leave for Texas.
- My next PET scan is scheduled for April 15th.
Prayer Requests and Praises:
- We are temporarily moving to Texas because I need a bone marrow transplant. However, it is crucial that the mass on my lung is gone before the transplant. The doctors will not proceed until it is eliminated, as the outcomes for patients with active disease are poor. Please pray that the chemo I am currently on will completely reduce the mass. We need to move to Texas regardless of the results of the upcoming PET scan because if my mass does not shrink completely, I will need a new array of treatment options.
- One of our kids came down with strep throat this week but is doing better. In God’s kindness, I was spared from sickness! Please pray that I continue to avoid illness, as any sickness could delay my chemo.
- There are many moving parts as we prepare for this transition. Please pray for our whole family as we embark on this new journey. The kids are excited—they can’t wait to see “a real cowboy!”
A Conversation on Hope During Medical Challenges
This week, Pastor Heath and I had a conversation about finding hope during difficult medical challenges. Here are several of the questions from the video:
- What have been some of the most difficult or discouraging moments?
- What has encouraged you along the way?
- Have you ever doubted God’s love or goodness during this journey?
- What would you say to someone who sees your suffering and struggles to understand?
- Is there a passage of Scripture that has been especially meaningful to you during this time?
- How can someone who is currently healthy prepare for future illness or suffering?
What Has Been Encouraging:
- With a busy schedule and small children, finding time to read can be difficult! I typically read in the middle of the night when I can’t sleep due to steroids and chemo. It has taken me seven months, but I finally finished The Lord of the Rings trilogy.
- Throughout the book, certain moments resonated with me deeply. One particularly powerful scene occurs when Sam and Frodo are on the final leg of their journey, approaching Mt. Doom. They are exhausted, thirsty, and desperate for sleep. Pushed to their limits, they crawl under a bush to rest while orcs lurk nearby. Sam takes the first watch as Frodo sleeps. Then, this moment unfolds:
“Then at last, to keep himself awake, [Sam] crawled from the hiding-place and looked out. The land seemed full of creaking and cracking and sly noises, but there was no sound of voice or of foot. Far above the Ephel Dúath in the West the night-sky was still dim and pale. There, peeping among the cloud-wrack above a dark tor high up in the mountains, Sam saw a white star twinkle for a while. The beauty of it smote his heart, as he looked up out of the forsaken land, and hope returned to him. For like a shaft, clear and cold, the thought pierced him that in the end the Shadow was only a small and passing thing: there was light and high beauty for ever beyond its reach.”
(The Lord of the Rings: One Volume, p. 922, emphasis mine)
- In that moment of great hardship, Sam looked up and saw a star piercing through the darkness. It reminded him that “in the end, the Shadow was only a small and passing thing.” For the Christian, this is true of all suffering. Grief, sorrow, and sadness are temporary, and Christ will be victorious in the end. In the gospel, there is “light and high beauty” forever.
“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:16–18)
Unspoken 