Tag: 1 Corinthians

Letters To A Young Engaged Man: Warm Heart vs. Cold Feet

by Sean Perron

Dear Young Engaged Man,

Don’t panic. After your last letter, I felt the icy fear freezing your feet. It almost made me want to put socks on. You are concerned about whether you should continue on the path toward marriage or bail for the single trail.

Let’s examine the series of events:

  • You have been studying your devotions and have spent a long time in 1 Corinthians 7.
  • You want to serve the Lord as best as you can and it seems Paul says singleness is the way to go.
  • Your friends are leaving for the missions field while you are registering for teapots and curtain rods.
  • Your friends are being radical and spending all day at the homeless shelter while you are spending all day licking invitation stamps.
  • You want to serve Jesus but now you are wondering how could you possibly be advancing the kingdom by pursuing marriage.

Pause. Grab the railing. Come let us reason together.
I think you already know the answer, but I will try to freshen the air.

The question of singleness or marriage all boils down to gifting.
Which gift do you have?

“Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.” (1 Corinthians 7:6-7 ESV)

Notice that both singleness and marriage are gifts. A gift is a good thing.
Singleness is not for the folks who didn’t make the cut. Singleness is not for those who missed the wedding bus and are sulking on the sewer curb.
No, the life of singleness is for those who are zealous for God and his gospel. God has designed singleness for those who do not settle for the mediocre. If you have the gift of singleness, seize it for the glory of God. Take life by the horns, ride the bull, live or die. Launch into the heat of the battle with no restrictions or reservations. Take no prisoners and leave no farewell letters. Visit the orphan, feed the hungry, heal the sick, and preach the gospel.

How do you know if you have the gift of singleness? You are not burning with passion for a wife. You are fine without fatherhood and satisfied without sex. You are content with Jesus and yourself.
Are these questions too basic or too secular? I don’t think so. Jesus has capital on the “secular” and he is the one who made the body to burn for his glory.

But what if you do desire a wife? What if you desire to lead a family and love a woman exclusively without reserve? This might mean marriage is for you.

Marriage is not for those less spiritual or those with less gusto for the gospel. The married life is not for those just couldn’t jump far enough on to the radical boat and are left on the unspiritual dock.
No, the life of marriage is for those who are zealous for God and his gospel. God has designed marriage to display his glory in a unique way. If you have the gift of marriage, don’t bail because you feel less spiritual. Take your wife by the hand, plunge into life, until you die. Launch into the heat of love with no restrictions or reservations. Take up a job and produce little children. Adopt the orphan, feed your neighbor, heal the sick, and preach the gospel.

He who finds a wife, finds a good thing. He who lives a single life, lives a good thing. The point of 1 Corinthians 7 is to live as you are called. Live each season with God first in your heart.  Advance the kingdom of Jesus according to the desires God has given you and according to the circumstances he has placed you in, even if it is not what you expected.

Brother, if your heart longs for your fiancee, it is no sin to marry. Receive it and do not reject it.

For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, for it is made holy by the word of God and prayer.
(1 Timothy 4:4-5 ESV)

I have belabored the point, but I am confident your burning heart will warm your cold feet.

Until then,
Sean

Worldview

“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” 1 Corinthians 10:31

Does the Bible change the way we look at sports, dating, music, sleep and free time? Christianity is much larger than Sunday morning or youth group. I have often slipped into the inconsistent framework of being a Christian by creed but an atheist in practice. Being a Christian involves your daily life. Jesus desires and demands influence in our daily lives. Going to church once or twice a week does not make someone a follower of Christ.  Jesus said, “Whoever desires to come after me, let him deny himself and pick up his cross daily and follow me.” (Lk 9:23) The Christian worldview is comprehensive.

“Whatever you do” is a pretty broad statement (1 Cor 10:31). How is it possible to glorify God in “boring” daily routines? It begins with the gospel and then connects to the glory of God. Jesus’ death on the cross has purchased every good gift we can experience in life (Rom 8:32). Everything we enjoy is a gift of grace that Jesus bought for us when He died on Calvary. “for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” (1 Cor 6:20). We cannot honor God without His help. Trusting in the cross changes everything we do. We have been set free from sin to properly enjoy life. How can we glorify God in whatever we do? We can glorify God above all things and in all things.

1. Above all things. Glorifying God is about calling attention to God. It is about bringing honor to Jesus. When we glorify God it makes Jesus look attractive to a lost world. Glorifying God involves showing that He is more valuable than everything. Here are a few practical questions to check your heart:

  • When you play football, is it clear to everyone that Jesus is more valuable to you than winning a game?
  • When you eat dinner, do you enjoy Jesus more than food or do your cravings command you?
  • When carrying on conversation with your classmates, do your words edify and make Jesus look good or tear down and exalt yourself?

I have a friend who reminds me frequently to “hold loosely.” Hold onto the things of this world in such a way that if God were to take them away you would still worship Him. My pastor often says that food, sex, family and ministries are good gifts but bad gods. Beware lest any gift becomes an “idol of the heart.” Enjoy Jesus above all things.

2. In all things. When a prisoner is set free from jail, he truly appreciates enjoying the warmth of the sunlight. He is thrilled to breathe fresh air and knows it is a precious gift that he does not deserve. Children are kings at enjoying the simple things of life. The Christian should also enjoy God’s gifts and realize they are free to enjoy them because of the gospel. Therefore, glorify God by playing basketball to the best of your ability. With the right heart, playing your hardest actually honors God. Worship God by enjoying every winning touchdown, ice cream, or day off from school. Laugh hard and live it to the brim. Enjoying God’s gifts makes Jesus look good!

God calls us to live an everyday life for the glory of God (1 Cor 10:31). This does not mean you need to force “Bible talk” into everything. God wants you to live life loving Him above all things and in all things. John Piper champions this topic in chapter three of Don’t Waste Your Life. He says every gift is a ray that points back to Jesus.

“The sunbeams of blessing in our lives are bright in and of themselves. They also give light to the ground where we walk. But there is a higher purpose for these blessings. God means for us to do more than stand outside them and admire them for what they are. Even more, he means for us to walk into them and see the sun from which they come. If the beams are beautiful, the sun is even more beautiful. God’s aim is not that we merely admire his gifts, but, even more, his glory.” (p.59)

He is the fountain from which all blessings flow. Living life this way gives you the highest joy because it is found in God. God has pleasures at His right hand that he offers to anyone who will taste and see His goodness. Why would anyone minimize the Christian life to only two days a week?

Sean Perron